Profile of a School Shooter: Ingredient 5 - Small Towns and Close-knit Communities

It wasn't until I began this project that I realized many of these shootings were committed in small towns or suburbs. They often describe the places school shootings happen as close-knit communities in news reports, but what does that phrase really mean?

Violence at school has long been considered an city problem. Small town America always felt somehow immune from these problems but in the 1990's all of that changed.

I looked around at my own small town and it was just unthinkable that such a tragic event could happen here, that a child could slip under the radar when we all seem to know what our neighbor had for breakfast last Sunday.

It turns out that many sociologists believe that is actually a big part of the problem. In a small town people are more concerned with maintaining the status quo. We may see or hear of danger signs but we are less likely to act on it. Too many personal connections can be both a blessing and a curse.

We not only know the child, but we know their parents, even their grand parents. We sit with them in meetings, attend school functions together, participate in extra-curricular activities.

It is one thing to turn in the child of a total stranger, a totally different matter exposing the child of a friend without certainty. In a small town, if you make an enemy, they are often an enemy for life. You learn to overlook things you might not otherwise. You tend to minimize things you see in order to minimize conflict. It is a lot harder to be honest with a friend than it is a with a stranger.

Administrators and teachers are less likely to rock the boat as well. When bullying happens, they are more likely to look the other way. They also tend to take a much less serious approach to discipline than larger schools. Lulled into a false sense of security by the small town atmosphere, they tend to insist that "boys will be boys."

Many kids reported that they felt the school would not listen to complaints even when they were lodged. Those in authority preferred to minimize it rather than deal with it. In Columbine specifically, there were reports that girls who reported sexual harassment were often not only bullied by the perpetrators, but by school staff as well.When a small town school is faced with problems such as racism, physical threats, or sexual harassment administrators aren't prepared to deal with it as a larger school system might.

Adding to that is the incapability of escaping the family reputation in a small town. A child who walks the same halls his parents walked before him, and his grandparents before them understands the pressure he is under. In small towns your reputation is very important, and a blemish on that reputation can often last a lifetime.

When you grow up hearing stories about the things your parents did in high school, it is easy to imagine your lowered status on the social ladder becoming a lifetime sentence. Not only will people remember you screwing up, they will remind you about it for the rest of your life.

Once again, the keyword is "feels." As adults we understand that the social ladder resets itself after high school, that we can escape whatever that reputation is and go on with our lives. We have gained perspective.

Teenagers don't really understand this concept, for a troubled teen high school really can feel like it will never end. In order to be helpful we often tell our teens that these are the best years of their lives. That their school years will define their futures. Before we take a walk down memory lane, we need to remember what it was really like for those who didn't fit in.

As parents and educators in small towns we need to be aware of the unique circumstances that rural teens face. We need to be aware of those who cause the problems and those who take the heat.

We need to offer our support to those who need it. We need to insist that everyone be treated equally. If we see bullying, we need to hold our school staff responsible for fixing it. If they refuse, take it to the school board. Take it to the State level. Take it to the national if we have to. As adults we need to insist that our schools are safe.